Men are from Mars and women are from Venus, or so the book leads us to believe! However, when it comes to orgasms, we are on the same page a lot more than we think, at least biologically. The feelings that are experienced when men and women orgasm are about the same, but that doesn’t explain why for every one orgasm a woman has, a man will have three. Apparently orgasms are like buses to men, you wait for one and then three come along at once! According to studies the main differences experienced come from the arousal that leads to orgasm, so we’re here to help you out with some tips.
Getting him off
Know his G-spots – men are full of G-spots which often get ignored:
The prostate – this pleasure spot, and it’s a good one by the way, can be accessed by gently pressing the skin (press, release, press, release) between his testicles and anus as he’s reaching orgasm.
His anus – you might want to run this one by him first, but if he gives the go ahead try circling his anus with your finger to start off with. If he’s happy to go further then apply some lube and gently insert your finger, up to about 2 inches, and curl it in towards the front of his body, when you feel a soft round area of tissue you’ve hit the prostate. Try circling it gently and then increase the speed as you get more comfortable. Now you know why vibrating butt plugs are so popular – you’ll blow his mind!
The frenulum (the underside of the penis) – This part of his penis, the tiny line just below the head, is full of nerve endings and when consciously stimulated can really get his motor running, and fast. During oral sex make sure that you bring your hand into play and, while moving it in tandem with your mouth, let your fingers graze his frenulum – you’ll give the best head he’s ever had!
Don’t tease him too much or he might miss the main event – unlike women, who need foreplay to get them going, men don’t need that much pre event stimulation. Yes you need to get him hard but you can concentrate on that when you’re just about ready to go. Seeing you having so much fun should mean he’s ready and willing to plunge right in!
Getting her off
Women are much more likely to have penetrative sex and not achieve orgasm, so make sure you work in some clitoral stimulation, whether that’s through oral sex – see our previous blog post for tips –or using your fingers or a vibrator
Foreplay - You need to get her juices flowing. Men are less interested in foreplay for a reason, their orgasm is easier to achieve through penetrative sex, oral sex, and hand jobs, hell you guys can even get off on a bumpy bus ride! Women however, need foreplay to get them to a certain level of excitement, not only does it make entry easier for you (and whatever toys you are using in the bedroom), but foreplay and clitoral stimulation are much more likely to lead her to orgasm
Multiple orgasms - Don’t stop the stimulation once she’s at the peak of her orgasm, by keeping things going for a little while longer you may drive her to have the much sought after multiple orgasm. Alternatively bring her to her peak and then stop and wait just a couple of minutes before applying different stimulation, for example, get her off with oral sex and then bring in the bullet, her next orgasm will be even more powerful and you’ll be a hero!
